Category Archives: Working through ideas

July Nano, homepage and boxes

It has been very busy lately. Firstly because I am finally leaving the dormitory life behind and, well, it takes some work to do that. Mainly things like packing and ordering a moving help and all that and I only have this last week end for it.

Secondly, because Nano is around the corner again. I doubted if I’d want to take it up. Because of the reasons up there. I thought it will go to half way to July, but then I was told I can finish the contract earlier and I went for it. So suddenly I discovered that I do get the time! Well, as much as it is available, but I can do it!

The idea, what to write, came to me few days ago  too, so now I’m super exited as if on coffee rush and can’t wait for it to start! For that I even made the Friday Flash Fiction entry a bit earlier. Oh, and because I don’t have any internet for the week-end. No time for writing either. Or not at least before Sunday.

But the idea!


Gale Wenalan , a gargoyle has a rare pearl he knows dragons would want – his baby brother. And thus, he hates dragons with a vengeance. It doesn’t help that Accark, a dragon, has moved across him in his apartment building and seems desperate to become his friend. Accark’s logic seems clear – he wants the pearl. But when the dragon shows up again, wanting to hire him, things don’t seem so clear any more.

I’m exited! Maybe it’s a fluff story, maybe something more, maybe lots of tears, maybe tragic – god knows. I have no idea! And that, my dear readers, is what makes it so deeply exiting. Ok, so maybe i already have some idea, but that has to end on paper now 😀 . Clicking on the image will take you to the homepage, where the character profiles are.

Speaking of which – I have filled out all the empty articles I had for the purpose of building the system, but got left to wait due the time that the publishing took. I still have a book at editing stage, but I figured it didn’t look right to have empty places, so I just gritted my teeth and went and did it. The only part that has no entries yet, is Feher’s characters. There are two reasons for that – Nano is starting and at the moment I think the publishing rate is full enough. So I’ll concentrate on Nano for now and leave that for the August, which would give me a nice prep for the next Nano, when I’ll take up the last alien book again and finish it – there are a lot of characters of that section, so it will take a lot of time to fill them all up.

I also began a new section there, which I hope to continue – LC Sunday Journal. It’s a bit different, so I hope you’ll be nicely surprised when you visit it.

I will hopefully have time for a movie though, after I have exhausted my energies on cleaning and packing. I decided that I just will make the time, because the last time I went to cinema was with my niece and half a year ago. So, a little grown up movie would be good for change, and the perks of going to see that at 22 in the night is soooo tempting.

But I gotta go back to work now – still have some boxes to sort out before I can go and collect the next punch and I still have some cargo packing to do as official work.


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Filed under Drama, kirjutamisest, Working through ideas, Writing, writing trivia

They have arrived!


They have arrived! My copies of the anthology are now in my hand and I’m staring at these darlings with all the sparkle my eyes can hold! 😀

Also – oh, I love myself so much! – I saw that I had put my story blog as a place to go see what I have written so far in the author’s description. So, yeah, I am waking it up again. It’s interesting though, how it keeps coming back. Well, I am giving it a second chance and see how it goes.

It has been busy day in my writing – first, and most important! The anthologies arrived. Sis brought them to my work and we celebrated a little with good sushi. Sis read my story and she laughed – “Let me guess – Madli was the inspiration.” Yup, she sure was!

After that I took a deep breath and consentrated on antoher important task I had set for myself. Besides the work, of course. I chopped up the story I have for 2YN course. After posting the first assignments, I’ve been feeling that something is very off with the character. Not in her lesson or what she has to go through, but something on the core level. A friend of mine already reminded me that I had another story with a weak main character, who had the goal, but no heart, so to say. Both of the stories have some prework done on them and neither is perfect. BUT if to put them together…!

So together I put them. And today’s main task was to get them work together too. It was nice as now I have much clearer tasks for her to fill. But to go any further and deeper, I now need to print out the encyclopedia I made for the stories and mix them so I later will know what I’m doing and so I know what I can use as leaverege for other characters so I can make her the sort of character I want her to be. Plus I think I found the inspiration to use as base for her character type, so I ought to take a book from library for it at some point before I begin writing the text itself. I know it sounds complicated and messed up, but considering the task, and that only 1/4th of it is done, I’d say it is on the right track at least and now I can start clearing the mess out. WHICH IS SO GOOD!

The work computer is opening everything up in WordPad. It is driving me nuts. I know there ought to be a Word 2013 somewhere in this mess of Windows 8, but I am yet to find it. Until then – ARGH!

As to top it all off, besides that I did 2 pages of editing. Should get a marker here somewhere on half-done works with deadline perhaps. You know, for “inspiration/frustration”.

Yeah 😀

Just wanted to let you know and share the good feeling.


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Updates on Nano

I was hoping to get to 40 000 tonight. Then arrived at work and in less than fifteen minutes developed such a migraine I haven’t had in years. Now, few trips to the bathroom and several painkillers later I’m starting to feel more normal again. However, I decided to skip tonight’s writing and perhaps read something instead. I am at 35 000 right now, so nothing bad will happen if I do decide to skip the night. Perhaps later, if the brain is working again I might get few words, but not taking it compulsory.

Fellow writers in Tartu are having get-together. And I am skipping them again. Not because I wouldn’t want to go – I really do – but because I am at work. I feel bad about that, but work obligations don’t disappear just because you want to.

One thing is sure – I do not want to search ideas for the apartment from pinterest tonight or do anything that demands moving anything up or down on the screen.

So perhaps a movie night with some mandatory beefcake is in order.

Which reminds me – I finally recalled the image that inspired Thorwald for my current Nano project! Click on the image and it will take you straight to the gallery of Tyler Jacobson. I love his artwork and been watching it for  few years now. He is truly good with his imagination. Take the next image after the “Thorwald” for example – the bowman – it is what inspired the tree spirit Miloard, although in the story he is nothing like it. But, hey, we’re not here to copy their ideas, but to be inspired by them Go see the artwork – it is worth the visit :).

by Tyler Jacobson

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Itch-itch, scratch-scratch

I’m in stage of itch-itch and scratch-scratch. I know Nano July is nearing in and sometimes  I even humor myself with thought of participating. And on the second thought I have 4 stories I’m currently writing that also need attention. So if I enter, it will rebel in style – wanna finish something or add words! Yeah, sounds about a good plan… perhaps I should…

I haven’t posted anything on the writing blog at the moment either, because I don’t have anything short at the moment. I might have a snippet though.

Dead Child’s Portrait – I am actively working on it. Re-reading what I have and trying to fill the holes and fix some ends. What a mess! Still hopeful though.

Fish Coat –  they got moving, now I need them in destination and rocking the freak world. Somehow. Testing different writing style and it goes slower. I feel like going on with this one for the Nano July…

Nano 2012 / Rustles – is missing the last 2-3 chapters and then is ready for ruthless editing. See? I have been working!

“The Experiment” –  Some time back I read from a description of a book, I think it was Winning the Story Wars, “…if you feel like graduating from boy-meets-a-girl stories…” and it planted something in my brain like alien plant bursting its tiny worm-like roots deep between the curves of your white brain cells before tossing its purple spear-like head through the grey brain cells. YES! TEACH ME!  I found a method online that seemed interesting and now I’m sort of working on pre-work for that experiment so I can try it out. It is simple, yes, but with my writing style, it has potential of working. So why not try out something new?

I also dig back out Dramatica Pro. It intrigues me, despite being complicated beyond my capabilities. I may have good knowledge on writing theories, but I feel dumb just looking at it.  A bit less dumber than last time I opened it up. The theory books is jewable and I can see the potential of it. Especially as it works on my older computers as well – a big bonus. Yeah, I’m still searching for a good writing program. Although each time I think I’ve found it, I end up abandoning it for Word and Excel also work well…

The itch-itch scratch-scratch problem is not only related with writing. Visited grandparents for Midsummer celebration. We don’t do something overly big, but it’s family event and kids get to play with each other and I get to cook my hearts desire (as if I don’t on other occasions) and it’s fun. That’s the main thing – it’s fun.

bf25387111a25bf3fda701e88d717ec4 Yes, getting smoked was fun – this was voted the best image we got and I do have better, brighter and clearer images.  The couple with grey hair in the back are my grandma and grandpa. And yes, he is that huge . Niece has already given up the party and gone for evening nap.

While there, grandma showed me her handwork – crochet bedspread made out of white cotton! Oh heavens! If there is one thing from what I call “Stepford perfection” (or the perfect world of 1940’s to 60’s) that makes me jealous of them, it’s that! Beautiful bedspreads that give the beds a nice finish. Or perhaps it’s that memory from childhood, when I was in hospital – we had like military order there how the beds had to be done. I was young enough to be influenced and I still like doing the beds like that.

Estonian old type farm house 

I remember my great grandmother’s bedroom – it was in old farm house (similar to what you see here  – they are awesome!). The house had no electricity (sue me – I liked houses that have no electricity) and the room there was with one window.  She was superb embroiderer and I remember a big wall carpet on her wall behind the bed, similar to what you can see on the image below. The trick with these is that they are not just decorations, but they also help to insulate the rooms. In a dark, electricity free room though – if you go in there with nothing but the oil lamp light, you don’t see the black background, but you will see the bright slightly shiny embroidery and it stands out as if painted wall panel.  Now that is one thing I can’t do – or perhaps if I put my mind to it, I can learn it eventually. She also had carpet that covered her bed.

Mulgimaa and Muhumaa wall carpet

I remember she also had beautiful towels with crocheted edgings that covered the daily used towels and her pantry shelves all stood out with laces cut out of paper.

It’s strange how I can remember such details even though I was only  a toddler the last time I visited it. Yeah, but how can you forget early morning mists and cold feet when you ran to the outhouse in blazing white cotton nightgown that reaches to your ankles to happen on your great grandmother cooking potato peels for pigs in the outdoor kitchen? That smoke is still making me dizzy with certainty that I am also able to live that life and would enjoy every moment of it.

OH! The reason of my memory lane! Seeing granny’s crocheted white bedspread brought me back to something I found some time back and saved in my bookmarks. It looks like this. Can you hear my fingernails scratch in the surface of the table? I wanna do something more challenging than an afghan. Something from thinner thread. Something that isn’t doily. Or snowflake.

The pattern looks like this. I have no problem posting this, for it can be easily found in the internet. At this point I’m posting the pattern, because I want it to be available for me whenever I go so I can just have access to it, when I start making it.

As someone, who still has dogs and probably always will and who hates white stuff in places that are always getting dirty, I’m thinking of making it natural…sort…of…thinking… or perhaps some deep wine red… Oh wait, my dogs hair are latte and toffee. So no red.

Itch-itch, scratch-scratch!

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Filed under Experiments, Working through ideas, Writing, writing trivia

Conall Lands and Lovecraft

The tiny idea I was telling you about.

Well, it turned out to have rather solid middle, so I’m now turning that mushy mess into something that has backbone. I want to try out one writing method and I think this is a perfect candidate for it. However, I can’t tell much about the idea itself yet, because, to tell you the truth, I still am solving the puzzle.

Doesn’t mean I’m not working on  basics of it :).

Lovecraft keeps hopping up in every corner. I’ve been lately doing a lot of reading on him and read the stories and same goes with Stephen King. Just a week ago I was dead beet into Tolkien. Still am. I really have no clue where this ends up with, because now I’ve picked up the Stan Nicholls’ Orcs book, too.  But Lovecraft – it keeps popping – first it was the small magazine Mythos Grimmly, which I seriously will work out for I like that idea a lot. Then a guy came to buy coins and I saw that he is currently reading Lovecraft! Then I was searching internet for some detail and saw again Lovecraft. So for some reason I’m between fantasy and horror classics and I’m actually enjoying it :).

Ok, back to the tiny idea. Perhaps I should use that as the name for that project, the Tiny Idea.You know, all big things start small.

OK. Why I first started writing this thing here in the first place?

I have a map!

Years of thinking about it, testing out different programs, disappointment and all the mambo jumbo and now! Now I have THE map!

I present to you…


Conall lands maastik

I declare it copyrighted for I have spent 2 days in a row making it. It isn’t perfect, but it is best I can come up with in short time, free online programs and half-dead brain. I started with donjon’s online program that creates fractal based lands. After finding something close to what I wanted, I went to Pixlr and continued having fun. I know it looks a bit quick-done and I swear I can do better with right tools, but right now I just don’t have them. That’s why it doesn’t have the cities on it yet either. I just wanted to stitch up the about-areas, where the story could happen.

Probably you’ll see a lot of it in the future with things added on it every now and then. Because I ain’t doing it again. At least not until I have proper computer and proper tool and not some freeware and pointy-mickey under my fingers. Or perhaps print it out, do a proper paintjob and scan it back in. I can already see logic mistakes here…

Locking my mind out! I’ll just do Tolkien on this one – create the land and fill it with people.

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Long paus over

It has been a long paus since I last updated what I was doing. Nothing new, I’m afraid – work, work, work and lots of stress. But now it’s all under control and working just as it should be.

But everything else! Oh my!

First, I sent off my first official submission for a story magazine. Yup! I did it! I sent the story! Well, I don’t know the results yet, but I can’t say I care much right now either, because to me it was important that I do it. That I will actually take the time, finish something and get it sent in in time. And I think as far as that purpose goes, I’ve fulfilled it. And this means that I have enough time to prepare, rewrite (because right now the reason I didn’t sent the story I was planning actually, is that it didn’t have time to be rewritten) the story and send that one off as well.

Secondly. Took a second step closer for a bugout bag. Or my weird understanding of it. That actually means I got myself a new bag and a pencil case to go with it. That pencil case has two big pockets which are in ideal size for a) the entire content of the handwork case. The other side should fit a good portion of the carry-with-you bugout items. Well, when I finally have them. Not because I’m crazy, but I kinda like the idea that I have them with me.
Oh, the selling point of the bag? It has pocket in size of my tarot cards! Considering I have bigger size than the regular sets, it is quite a troublesome to have them with me. Which I now can freely do, because they are situated so that they don’t hop around thus stay in shape better, which in the end means I have them for longer time.

We also had Lammas. 🙂 Ok, a week ago from now, but I did celebrate it – made fancy kringel for celebration and I held a small ceremony for myself and for the deities. We don’t have it in our traditions, but I’m growing to like it. Setus, south region Estonian national group, have tradition of a day near it called Makavei day, a day when according to tradition bread was taken to church to be blessed and apparently apples finally got their taste. I must say the fantastic smell that came from the orchard next door after that day did blew me away.

It is also the harvest time of the berries. Or, actually, the harvest should be done by now. We should be celebrating the harvest. This year we did the harvest few days after the holiday, but right in the New Moon time, so it should hold fine. I was kinda hoping the birds would have eaten most of it, but apparently they don’t harbor enough hunger or we have too many bushes. Still, it only took two days to swipe them over and it was done. Mom did the juice and jam on the next day. I usually do it, but this year I had no wish to take part of it. No worries, mom said, I’ll get the mood next year and then she won’t want anything to do with it. It was for the best, considering I managed to get sunstroke again. I can’t help it. That’s what my skin type is like.

Lauritsa Day is coming on 10th. It’s a fire holiday. I love it, because we always try to make pancakes and try to keep from making living fire. Not to mention the Baltic herring is the best! And I can swear on that one! It’s one of those days when it is seriously unadvised to make fire. It was also advised not to cut forest or make hay, cut heads of cappages or to go in orchard to bring fruit in. Basically anything that would be similar to the damage fire would make. It’s an important holiday for my family, though we don’t really celebrate it in usual way. To keep fire in line, it is actually advised to do some washing. Considering it is Saturday, that’s pretty much sure thing.  

Why I’m so exited for this day, is the Milky Way! I have missed it so much and would love to see it again and around this time, it will be visible again.

Remember I said I have a year-long project called “The knife”? I seriously should name it.
It ended on Monday. I told a friend that I’m searching for a knife, quite particular one. I had to, she saw me looking at those fancy Finnish blades and so I said, why I was suddenly staring at some blades with my tongue on my shirt. But I have been between getting a good smith made blade from their website or finding one around here. Either way, a pricy uptaking.
The next time we saw, she suddenly bloomed up and said she got me something and gave me contacts of a local smith – Mart Salumaa. I counted my money, got some pre-info from my friend and sent him an e-mail. Said I’m searching for someone to make me viking women’s knife. He said the price, I agreed and then he said he is near Tartu and on Monday he came and we made the deal.
It is gorgeous!!! Super sharp! As he demonstrated on the hair on the back of his hand (it’s a trick local smiths use here) and of course humored his fellow smiths he had with him in great deal. It is not very big, but not the smallest one either. He had different sizes with him, but I chose the middle one. I have short fingers. I prefer my knife smaller. It is shiny and utmost gorgeous. So I’m on conclusion that it was the right decision. To get a knife that has been through fire and water, air and dirt. Gotta love smith work! Totally worth the money :).
I shall photograph it and show it off soon as well. Right now I’m searching for a good leather to make sheth for it. It is so sharp it cut through the thick shield it was in in less than a minute. Plus if I want it to be carry-around-with-me-until-death-do-us-part, it must be properly protected. Which means right now I’m in search for a good piece of leather to make the sheath from. I have done sheaths before. It’s just matter of prework, working out the best model, testing the size, renewing few tools… Ok, so it isn’t walk in the park, but Rome wasn’t build in a day either. But I’m sure Brisa Knife Supplies has some items that will shorten that road considerably :).


Filed under Drama, tools, Working through ideas, Writing, Year and a Day

My favorite character part II: Saul-Erik

I wrote about what kind of characters I like. I didn’t write about my favorite one.

Why I love this character so much, is because despite being an impact character, since I’ve created him some years back, he has grown a lot from being just a name to someone, who I can really relate to.

The name.  King Saul was distinguished for the greatness of his knowledge and for his great physique. He was king appointed by God, who his people didn’t recognize as worthy.  He wasn’t the best of the kings, but there are certain points in his life that remind me of, who Saul-Erik is.  Erik Thorvaldsson, the Norse king Erik the Red, was the one, who first created Norse settlement in Greenland.

Saul-Erik was born in summer 1969. His first years were spent in a family with power hungry father. He ran away, when he was just 9, but didn’t spend much time on the streets. He was found and picked up by Rasmus, his future mentor, who took the boy to his friend’s family, who already had a small boy, Oliver.  They grew up together and became inseparable, like brothers. They are very different in nature, Oliver being more closed up that he is, but they complement each other and they appreciate the critics and advice both offer. This can’t be said to Saul-Erik’s genetic family.

They travelled a lot, when he lived with them, often because the family belonged in a group that was experimented on in 1950s. The society fears them and the others like, because of the history. They are often scared off by locals after they find out, too blinded by fear, so in time, the group becomes more secluded than ever. This constant fear of being found out and the childhood fear of possibility of “caring citizens” taking him away from the family, is what thrives him to this day.  There was an incident, when one time it almost happened and that fear haunts him still. He might not share their blood, but he is forever thankful for their generosity for taking him in and offering him loving family.

While he is there, Rasmus, noticing his leadership abilities, starts training him. Rasmus is the previous leader of the group, before the group had to disintegrate over night. He hasn’t given up on the idea of bringing the group back together, but he knows he won’t be the one doing it. Saul-Erik, however, proves to be eager material for transformation and so he begins teaching him everything he knows in order to him one day make his plan come true.

When he is 17, in his stepfather’s urging to make amends with his family, he returns to home, but only stays there until he turns 18 and then rejoins Oliver’s family. He doesn’t get along with his father still after all the years.

Meanwhile, Rasmus takes care that Saul knows, who he is preparing to be and gets educated accordingly. He masters economics and real-estate. He knows all the time, that he will one day be set with responsibility over the group and he takes this responsibility very seriously. His mission is simple, but hard to accomplish. Create a haven to those, who are hunted by the society for belonging in the human experiment group, plus few others. A place where they could just sit outside, walk to a shop or walk their dogs without being brought out to be problematic creatures that they were. The idea was simple, the theory doubtful, but the creating was beyond anything he planned to have.

He grows up to be 5’8 tall and medium built. His dolomite grey eyes and light hair often diminish any argument and give others impression that he means business. The only scar he bares, is the one running across his right hand wrist. It was bicycle accident from when he was 14, but because everybody joked about it “that’s a way to try to meet his maker”, on benigh fooling, he had a bracelet tattoo. His stepfather gifted him a silver bracelet to mark the foolishness of his and now he wears a tattoo around his right hand wrist with a silver bracelet. It gives impression of cover-up and those, who don’t know the story think he attempted suicide and lived. He lets them believe to certain level.

By personality he is considered to be well-honed in diplomacy and he is very honest. He indeed knows diplomacy, but he can’t second the latter. Since 1998, when he began his mission to bring the group back together and started his business of buying and then resettling the bought houses with “his kin”, he has been anything but honest to outsiders. To his own people, he is young and full of potential and he tries to stay honest with them as much as possible, but to outsiders he has fixed a reputation to keep them away. It has brought him in attention of the police, but having been observed throughout his life by the “caring society”, he knows well how to play that game.

His plus would be his strength and passion hi puts in his mission. His strength seems to spread around in the room, when he walks in. On the other hand it makes him obsessed with control. He is very cautious, who he lets in the group and how big risks he allows his kin to take. He doesn’t always hold them back, but they know the last look he sends after them, when they leave, is filled with worry. That sometimes makes others question if the man is prepared to take tough decisions if needed, but because he has proven otherwise in several occasions in the past, they, as for now, look past that, never facing up to him with it. However, he is aware of it and that makes him insecure sometimes. He turns out to be very arrogant sometimes; often blunt and very open about what he wants.

He is an impact character. So, he is impact character to Evelyn. Evelyn is a woman, who travels in his town to find her father. He learns of her from Mykola, when the man comes searching for a new hiding place, because his previous cover has been blown. While he is staying in the house next door, he tells him stories of her and his own search for normality and how she nearly completed his quest, offering it to him. Saul-Erik realizes, listening him, that he does not want to sacrifice his own happiness for the group. He has already dedicated his entire life to them, but he doesn’t wish to end up alone because of that. His own created paradise has turned into personal emotionless prison. But he loves listening Mykola’s stories and he secretly falls in love with that ideal woman, who offered normality for abnormal. After a while, Mykola leaves and he is left with longing for something he knows could jeopardize his mission.

But then Evelyn calls in his firm and asks to rent a house. Learning, who she is, he makes the one uncalculated decision and selfishly gives her the house next door to his. An outsider deep inside the group territory. Two days later his rational thinking returns and he deeply regrets it, especially when he learns that she might be a bounty hunter. He knows that people like that can be bought and this creates him problems – if he lets her follow her trail, she might find information that will be harmful for the entire group should she ever think selling it. On the other hand he is fascinated of the woman he has heard so much about and that creates a problem of his own, the sort Rasmus can’t help him with.

What happens next you can read in the book next year ;).

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Filed under characters, Dead Child's Portrate, Merry-Go-Round Blog Tour, Working through ideas, Writing