Day 7. Practice: Sunrise, Sunset, Symbols
I didn’t see the entire sunset, only the last portion of it. It was the cleaning day and I finished so late it was already over most part. But considering the usual sunrise-set takes nearly an our and a half, forgive me if I don’t have this time right now. Still, sitting in bus, on my way to county, I got a good look at it.
- What did you experience internally as your witnessed this event?
I felt like day life was giving way to night life. It’s sort of like looking at the stereogram. You either see it or you don’t. I felt ok with darkness settling, because I know it is as necessary as day.
- From this experience, what do you imagine this sunrise or sunset could symbolize?
It was calming reminder that entire day’s full of jobs have come to an end and it was time to rest.
- Now think about a symbol from a spiritual path from your past. Spend time contemplating this symbol’s meaning. What could this symbol mean for you today?
The symbol from my spiritual past, which I’ve felt very close to, has been Sun cross. I love it, because it represents me the past that survived, times when you adapted and survived. We have few sun crosses survive in old churchyards or cemetaries. No one knows exactly what they were for, but the fact that such pagan symbol (because the old texts on things also depict Sun the same way) survived. It makes me proud and I often wear mine next to my pentagram, because I feel they go together.
- Do you like your life to be perfectly organized or do you not mind a bit of chaos?
I don’t mind chaos, because most of my life seems to go by it and works out fine. Still, I am home perfectionist, meaning that while in human communication I don’t mind mess most time, I need close to perfect clean attitude when it comes to my home. I don’t seek so much perfectionism as ideals. To make the best possible background where to load myself and to heal my wounds.
- Do you respond to most queries with action or with contemplation?
I think I’m both, but I don’t think I always think it through far enough not to spark a conversation. Sometimes I loose my meaning at first thanks to this, but I get to the point. Hehee, wouldn’t be a writer if I didn’t know how to do that.
- Are you active and mobile or are you laid back and sedate?
I’m active and mobile, thought I want to be more laid back and sedated. But that way I wouldn’t have things going and reaching what I want (if I figure it out) would be far longer and tiresome road.
- Do you believe that every question has a definite, logical answer or do you think that questions can sometimes beget more questions?
The latter. But I don’t believe that the question is more important than answers either. If you only ask, but don’t find answers for the questions you ask, you don’t get more out of it than if you hadn’t asked the question in the first place. If you get your answer, that’s when you ask the next question or raise your doubts. They are the two sides of learning curve.
- Are you naturally internally focused or externally focused?
I think I level somewhere in-between. Though I am extravert and enjoy people’s company a lot, I grow tired of it just as fast and need place and time for myself. Those times I tend to really relax, in sense that I don’t even write or deal with other projects. I either watch movies that I’ve liked in the past or waited for long time to find the time for. Right now I feel that I’ve lacked such time for so long, I’m doing exactly that and my focus on my studies is suffering.
- Are you naturally patient or not?
Nope. I don’t have patience and it’s like written in everything. I have patience to work on something, but I’m not very patient person.
- Are you strong willed, decisive, and direct? Or are you easy going and more indirect in your approach to people and tasks?
I am definitely strong willed. That doesn’t make me more direct, I just know what I set my eyes on and I get there. I tend to reach my goals, even if they take year or two longer than others. I am easy going when people are involved and that can both blessing and course. I’m sure my own purposes would take far less time if I would be introvert, but all the learning would be undone in that case and that’s again… pointless.