Officially launching my homepage!

My homepage is here!

I am still working on adding the encyclopedia part as this is the thing that will take the most time, but everything else is finished – bios, contacts, decorative side, free reading. This blog will be here and will continue like always, but this will be my official page from now on to show off for business.

So without further due – clicking the button will take you to my now official homepage. Feel free to share it around!


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My first story

You are allowed to laugh. You are allowed to read, just don’t laugh out too loud.

story for l6mmeleht.png

Today is my birthday and unfortunately I don’t have time to take for painting. But I hope this makes up to it.

I have probably already told you how it became to life. Which is pretty much the story, why I began with this crazy thing called writing in the first place. But so that the picture and the story are in the same place -> Continue reading

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Filed under Drama, my own works

So I think I am a fan…


I’ll be 31 in few days.

Guess what I got for my birthday?  Continue reading

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Work space

I wanted to show off🙂

We all know that for a writer, their office, or wherever they work, is pretty much their temple. Same with me. One needs a GOOD feeling place to create monsters that take over the world. I just had my last piece of the puzzle put in place, so I’m very happy and exited to show it off.

2180485929007716668-account_id=0So, a bit about this tiny room. It is actually a half of a room. The big brown cupboard is actually the back of another small office space which is occupied by my brother. Yes, I am living at home right now and yes, we do share a room. I actually have a decent job, time for my writing and time to play with my dog. So, sue me. It’s down to practicality of life, times are hard enough.

Enough of the introduction – this is my office. Welcome! That Monopoly on the left side on the wall – I painted that some years ago. Worth that 3 months of mini brush work. Around it are artworks by my niece. You can’t see on the pictures, but her artwork is also on the other side of the office, on the wall, framed. In an easy reach, there is also the loupe, for we two are pair of curious people, so we need our main tool in fast reach.

9177896642838483138-account_id=0The second picture is closer up on my book shelves. I was very happy, when it turned out that all my books fitted in there just right, with only few places empty of fairy tale books that are now in niece’s collection.  In front of the books are the few things that I keep – the tea box is Idea Chest Game I once did for my writing group. Still plenty of pieces to go. The small chest next to it is my collection of story cubes. I need a next box for the new ones🙂.

As you can see, I have a collection of dolls around me. Might be, because I’m a bit of a kid in heart, but I’ve always kept some kind of tokens near me. They all have their place and reasons. Maybe I’ll tell you about them some time. Next to the Barbie is my writing mug. Sis got it for me from the last Hanseatic Days fair. It is usually full of coffee with milk and I absolutely love it!

3105966192191881356-account_id=0Yes, I do own a green chair on a yellow carpet I can pick on with my toes. I like colors. I can’t keep my toes in place when I sit, so somehow I’ve come to like those bathroom carpets with long bristles. On top left you can see Tobbie, my scull. He sits on top of a box made by my grandpa. LOVE it so much! I have a huge chest like that too.

The place has some hidden secrets too, like the tiny table where the keyboard is on – it comes out easily to make a full size table where I can paint. The cupboard beneath the table is where all my art supplies are.

I know it’s small. I don’t really care as what I need is right there. All the books for writing, the art supplies for painting, the printer, the computer. And privacy. It is the most private place in the house and for that, I am very, very happy for writing does not always want an audience.

That’s it. That’s my work station at the moment. It has childish features, and will get some of them more over time, but it has what I need as a writer – a chair, my notes and possibility to write until early hours of the morning without disturbing others. Perfect in every way🙂.



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Filed under Drama, elements of writing, kirjutamisest

Sick leave

I was sick. Not like “it’s gonna go away in few days” cold, but “gotta stay in bed for those few days” kind of cold. And this is the first time over the pass of a week that I actually opened my PC.

It was the weirdest flue I’ve had in years. The entire family got it after mom got sick few days earlier. Even I spent several days in bed with 38 C pretty much sleeping the days off. Very unfriendly in light that we still had ton of work to do, not to mention the berries are still not picked. But despite feeling better enough that not every move makes me sweat, I am still surprisingly tired. Which can be expected with this, but in truth, it is astonishingly annoying. I feel like I’m way behind with everything, including the Friday Flash Fiction, which I skipped, because my brain pretty much had one way mind – water, water, water, water, water… I am putting it up together with the next one this Friday, because I like how I can count the parts and weeks as the same, but of course, officially it won’t count. As of daily work, that came back with a vengeance and all the days I spent “almost” laying around, I pay by having to double the efforts to get it all done in the next few days. Which isn’t helping with the recovery as I still feel tired every single day.

So while I was at it, brainless and feeling one with the zombies, I listened an audiobook written by K.C. Burn and read by Tristan James. If James reads it – I’m buying it and he can recite me how intestines work if he so chooses. Actually, I’ve been doing just that – searched audiobooks based on the readers and that guy has somehow managed to read them all so the readers is good and also the way he reads the sentences – all the pauses are where they are suppose to be! God! I never thought it to be the thing that marks my reading, but yup, I choose books based on where you pause your tongue. 

The book itself, Cover Up by Burn was a nice one. I couldn’t get myself into the first one of the series, because Burnes loves descriptions and I think it was a bit overkill there, but the second book – very lovely. I kept pausing and writing out expressions. Which is just as great, because listening it during work made me feel accomplished despite the missing brain.

I also managed to watch an anime somehow. I am testing Netflix again, so brother lent me his tablet. It was called Kuromukuro. It has been a while since I had time to watch any series thing, so I was like obsessed. I can’t remember everything though, but I do remember that I liked the main character, the samurai guy. Might be my flue talking, but he did little things, not big deeds, but little ones that really made you sigh happily.

He has this nice drawing app on it! As a random fact – it seems that because I had a habit of pushing the paint around on the canvas with my fingers, and I changed the fingers after getting them dirty one by one (much easier to wash them together than after each use), I tend to do the same thing on tablet – after one color “smears” the finger, I automatically change finger before continuing the drawing. Interesting needless habit. That’s the thing I tried.






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Place the light hasn’t touched

We all have those cupboards somewhere in the house that contain the memories of lost times that don’t get touched as long as there is anything else that needs work on.

I tackled one of them today. Despite the coughing. It just felt like it today. When I moved, I brought some of the shelves with me, because if you have books then there is never too few shelves. But before I could get them in place (we found a place for them! That’s a miracle), brother insisted on a merry-go-round. Because the things he wants to put away need a place in another cupboard, where we need to make space beforehand and those things need place of their own before, etc. Long story short – this cupboard was fourth in a row, not including the boxes underneath the beds.

I agreed to it and he helped! We had one morning off and in all, the biggest three took us only 3 hours in total, got a lot of space now and now I have place for everything. More like, now I know again where everything is.

But when I got to this one, it gave me a jolt – seemed like I hadn’t moved anything there the past 5 years after we rearranged our room. It indeed looked more like juvenile hideout than a grownup’s office…

I found some odd stuff from there, from the black tea brew I prepped for henna painting, some  Magic The Gathering cards, a bottle of Devil’s Oil (oil with sesame seeds and chillies – superb pain relief), a variety of paints, papers and coffee set… As if anything that needen’t be in daily life had ended up in there. So I took my sweet time cleaning it all out and replacing it with things that I actually use. Like organized version of the mess. I feel proud and accomplished, despite knowing there is one more office cupboard we need to tackle before we can bring in the bookcases.

I seem to do nothing else lately than clean. But it is all for good purpose. If for nothing else, then to know where i keep what. It’s just been so frustrating lately to search half an hour before I can start. It was as if there was no space to what I wanted to do. Maybe that’s also why my writing has drizzled down to nothing – I feel no space around me. With all the Barbie doll stuff around me and everything else, it just wasn’t happening.

Oh, yes, I’m making doll clothes again. Because sis moved too, some of the dolls came to my place for spa. And with all the tossing out old clothes, I kinda went through them with eye out for soft materials that would make nice dresses and pajamas and coats and trousers and… the whole wardrobe really. I have already turned my old red winter coat into one coat for Barbie and found punch of other stuff that would be nice material for some other things, including, if I can manage it, some handbags and other things. Gives me a way to test out some patterns I’ve been eying on Pinterest lately.

In that line, I’d like to note down that I am very proud for my niece. There was this Ken doll I got some years back on a whim that then moved on to niece. Turns out he has lost half of his arm at some point, yet she still plays with him and it seems to be no problem. “Perfect to play doctor on” as sis said.

Ok, but I’m gonna go and finish off some homepage stuff now and then see if I can finally get to that anime I’ve had an eye on for a while.

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Murphy law? No, University!

Wanna know something “funny”?

Or, this post should be called “I can’t believe this is happening”.

After I ended the contract at the dorm, because we were told by the office that the place will go under renovation starting from August, after having to pack up my entire 16 years of dorm life in one week-end, order and pay for moving truck, then going back and cleaning and helping sis to pack her life up and finding money for her move as well and all the other stuff that goes with the “fantastic” thing called “moving”, because they needed to start the preps (clearing the electrical things, removing the left furniture, etc) for the renovations in autumn… Oh and after I had no proper time to find home to my two good tables, which I loved and cost me quite a bit, not to mention the chairs, the cupboard, my beloved sofa, because I have no place for them and which I pretty much lost…

Guess what?

The university let the office know that they will not do the renovation in those rooms this year…


I’m not even blaming the office, for I know how things are with them and I am convinced they would have not forced us out had there not been certainty of the need, for heck I know how hard it has been in that house the entire year. But I am blaming university. For fucking up 16 years of my life in close range and in long range.

For finding that little JOKE out, I started thinking – each time I’ve felt like screwup in my life, each time I had to do a 180 turn in my life, thinking I made a bad decision or wrong decision, guess whose decisions were the cause? UNIVERSITY!

When we had to deal with students that should have been removed from the dorm – university. When I had to quit on my last year, because they changed my contract and I lost the base to get student loan – university! When I was told that i had to take the last year in day study, when the clear reason I went in week-end study was because the daily study does not suit with my work life – university! When I was told I couldn’t change my major, because I was 2 points over the limit – university! THAT, by the way, they changed after I had talked with the supervisor, who told me I can do it, because I qualify… U.N.I.V.E.R.S.I.T.Y!

But this time… I don’t know. I laughed like an idiot, when I heard this one. I just spent 150 euros on moving, which I need for other areas of my life! I lost all the furniture I invested in, because I didn’t have sufficient time to search place for them! I feel like… like… God, this feeling doesn’t even have a name.


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Movies and short story

I read a short story Bianca’s Plan by B.G.Thomas. Didn’t plan to, but I had downloaded it a while back when I was still testing out the Amazon Prime thing, and forgotten it. Until few days ago I felt like I needed a Christmas cheer (in the middle of summer – yay, me!) and read it.

Ok, so I know that because it is Christmas story, it was clear from the start that it was gonna be sweet and cute story and that’s exactly what it was, so if you are not into that, skip it. But if you want to read something really nice with lovable characters, who make you grin, then it’s a book for you. And the little twist in the end – just right cherry on the cake!

The only thing I’d note would be the fact that Gavin, Curtis and the other guy, Gerry?, sound too similar and made me go back several times to check if I was reading the right guy’s inner monologue or not. For 65 pages, it wasn’t that bad, it just irked a bit.

I’m remembering the author though – to check out other stuff, because the characters were really, really nicely written.

As of my own writing – it has been waiting in the corner until now. The moving, ending the contract at the dorm, took a bit more of my time than I expected, as usually such things do, and now we are moving mountains with my brother to make room for the furniture I brought over.  I just realized it’s already 8th.  We still have things to do, but if all goes well, perhaps I’ll start getting some time off starting Monday and can get back to my schedules. I did manage to get the Friday Flash Fiction up, which made me feel a bit better.

Also, when I was moving last week-end, I went to see two movies. Purge III and Independence Day II.

I must admit, I’m torn, when I think about the Purge – in general I really like the idea – horrific and makes you really think of the value of life and social statuses. But with this last one… It went too much into the clean cut movie script. And it screwed up.  With one character especially. You know those characters that are put into the movie to create emotional impact on the watcher? This movie had one – Joe Dixon. With his overly racist view (and I’m not exaggerating), the entire attitude he carried and the way the writer raised this particular character’s stakes – you could so do without it. It was embarrassing to watch and half of the movie I kept looking in other characters if this character could have been easily melted into them, for the truth is – the movie would have won from it. It was just so… so… stereotypical. Yes, that’s the word for it. There were other characters around him, like Marcos, Laney, Mrs Sabian, the old guy playing cards – all people with ethnic background and they were fine and then there was Joe and he did not work. I kept mulling over the reasons, why he didn’t work, for few days after seeing it, because I find it to be a very interesting case.

Then I went to see the Independence Day: Resurgence. I didn’t plan it, I just had few hours to kill. With the Purge still fresh in my head, I guess I kept my eye on characters that were put in for emotional impact with this movie. Most of them worked for me, especially the doctor duo, which was so freaking adorable it broke my heart, when one of them died. The scarf thing – oh how painful to the heart. I didn’t like though how they brought in all the kid characters from the previous movie and used them in all. It came off as fabricated and moldy a bit. Julius Levinson though – like meeting an old friend🙂.

I thought I would be more annoyed with the fact that it was clearly built scenario rather than being organic like Purge felt. Yet it was the opposite – the Independence Day movie script, for me, worked while Purge fell flat, yet they used the same techniques and they even had same type of jokes in them. Weird, huh? Well, I’m waiting for DVD now to watch them both again and to compare them again, for I have been meaning to make a movie study and at this point, I think I want to do it on Independence Day.




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Filed under books I've read, Drama, my own works